How to be surprised!

This is a copy of my most recent post on Dorm Room 718.

1. Believe everything people tell you.  There's no way they're not telling you the whole truth.
2. Underestimate your friends.
3. Underestimate your parents.
4. Refrain from texting people because you don't want to impose.  It will give them time to drive to your town.
5. Tell everyone where you're going and the exact time you leave.  It will give them time to call your parents.

In case you didn't hear--but you probably did--I had quite the birthday.  First things first, birthdays are not a big thing in my family.  You get a cake if you're lucky.  We'll take you out to your favorite restaurant eventually, but they've never been super celebrated.  For the record, it's not that we never celebrate, we just do it when it's convenient.  I've always celebrated my birthday on July 3rd when my family gets together because the church and town throws a party. Three of us grandkids have birthdays in July so it's nice and convenient.  Plus there's a fireworks show.  Sometimes I'll have a bonfire in late July or early August if I'm feeling motivated.

I did not expect anything different this year.  I really didn't.  Every time Nicole would mention my birthday, I told her I wasn't planning anything.  She would always get upset and the conversation would end with something like:

Nicole:  You're so frustrating.  You're driving me crazy.
Me: I'm sorry, I told you I might do something in August.

So the night before my birthday, I was feeling a little weird about turning 20.  It's a scary number, especially when you feel like you should be taller or just feel older. I was talking to Nicole when Melissa asked me to come over and watch a movie. I asked Nicole if I should go and she told me I should. Mind you, this was 11:45 at night. I knew Nicole had something to do with it, I thought she put Melissa up to it. I decided to go to get my mind off things and when I walked downstairs, there was a figure in a hoodie just chilling on the couch.  I thought it was Melissa's sister, until the figure started laughing.  Helloooo Nicole. Surprise #1.  At that point I thought that was the extent of the surprise.  I had no reason to believe anything else.  I was in complete and utter shock.  For weeks I had heard her griping about how she was working that weekend. I smiled for the rest of the night--until I went to bed at 4 am.

Melissa and Nicole wanted to take me out for lunch the next day, but I declined, saying I had a grad party to go to. Nicole told me the grad party started at 2...at which point I knew this was a lot deeper than I thought and that my parents knew about this. Surprise #2.  So they took me out to lunch the next day and we made plans to hook up with Melissa after she got off work at 9. Meanwhile, Nicole and I headed to that grad party.  After that, we went to my place, rented a movie, and I started to wind down for what I thought would be a relaxing night.  I decided to check the mail, at which point Nicole told me she told people to write letters to me.  Surprise #3.

We took some time to chill before watching the film when all of a sudden my doorbell rang.  Nicole ran to go get it and at THAT point, I knew I was in for much, much more. Surprise #4.  My friends started showing up and I was treated to my first ever surprise party, which included having packing peanuts poured on me multiple times and one heck of a cake. My parents knew about everything.  Everything.

I had no reason to suspect anything. No one made me suspect anything and even if there were hints, I never picked up on them.  Nicole has never been dishonest and this has dealt a serious blow to my trust! :P  Maybe this is what I get for befriending people with acting experience?  After reluctantly kicking people out because we both had horribly early mornings, we went to bed.  As I was practically in tears out of pure happiness and awe that someone had put in so much time and effort to throw me a party, Nicole said, "I told you, I just like birthdays." Go figure.

And that is how to let someone surprise you.  Needless to say, Melissa and Nicole turned turning 20 into an event I won't soon forget.  My life is truly epic.

With love and hugs,

Megan

Grad Parties

I sincerely hope your summer is eventful and you're staying cool in the heat wave.  I hear it's supposed to last all week. Oh well, it's a taste of what the New Orleans trip might be like. ;) Two weeks!  I can't contain myself much longer.

Summertime for us freshman coming back home and for the graduating high school seniors means one thing: Grad parties.  In my area, they last well into July if not all summer.  I hear that's a little bit strange but it's how we do. Last weekend I went to parties for my friends Sabrina, and Taylor.  This weekend I went to the party for my friend Kendra (who is a future Cobber!) and next week I'll go to a party for my cousin,William.

Grad parties are epic for several reasons.  You've got the food, everything from taco bars to pulled pork sandwiches, all sorts of salads, and ice cream!  Oh, and anyone with a chocolate fountain gets some major points from me. Grad parties have been a wonderful opportunity for me to see friends who weren't in my graduating class, and to talk a bit about college and answer any questions. It's been lovely, but coming back and going to all these grad parties has made one thing painfully evident... how much of a difference a year makes.

We, meaning my graduating class and I, are in a completely and totally different phase of life than just a year ago. I don't necessarily believe it's an issue of drifting apart, but everyone is off doing their own thing, living their own lives. I expected to see certain people, and I didn't.  In some ways the grad party ushers in this phase of consciously removing yourself from a group state of mind and basing your decisions on yourself and what you need.

I always say that leaving my hometown for college was one of the best decisions I ever made.  I will always stand by that statement, because I didn't compromise my happiness for ease. To their credit, I believe all my graduating friends have understood the importance of doing what's right for them and have acted accordingly. I'm proud of all of them.  I think the summer before you leave for college is the best and worst possible.  You do whatever you can to have as much fun as possible, but the impending separation is too tangible to ignore.

It may be painful, but it can also be exciting and wonderful at the same time. I guess a lot of changes in life are like that...

Be well, stay cool.
All my love,

Megan

When Life Gives You Lemons...

Woah Readers, woah.  I know I haven't blogged since the last days of college, and I know it's been FOREVER, (literally it has been over a month) but I needed some time to relax and not blog and the time has also let the epicness accumulate so there's more excitement for you to come back to when I finally decided enough was enough. Here we are, June 12th, and My Epic Life is officially off hiatus.

You know the saying, "When life gives you lemons make lemonade" right?  Who doesn't know that saying?  Long story short, I take it to mean something like, "When life gives you an opportunity, take it and do something good with it."  Well, about three weeks ago, life gave me lemons.  Here's the story:

So I had been going to church with Nicole (the mastermind behind Dorm Room 718) almost every Sunday ever since the beginning of the school year.  I think the first time I went was in October?  Anyways, I got to know people there and soon I had a church family.  I didn't really see that coming, but I figured I would just go with whatever happened.

Throughout the entire year I kept hearing about this July trip to New Orleans for the ELCA National Youth Gathering and thought, "Hey cool, I can't wait to hear about it in the fall when I see people again."  Now here's where the lemons come in.  On May 23rd, Nicole told me they had someone drop out and people wanted to know if I would consider filling the slot as an adult leader.  *CUE FREAKOUT*

After losing WAY too much sleep over it, I said yes on June 5th and here I am, trying to mentally and physically prepare for an intense 11 day trip in July.  It all feels a bit surreal, like I never imagined I would be doing something like this or taking such an opportunity despite the financial strain.  At the expense of my dignity, I will use the acronym YOLO just this one time.

I'm feeling overwhelmed... this is like, SO MANY BUCKET LIST ITEMS BEING CROSSED OFF AT ONCE! Here are some of the things I'm excited for:

1. I get to lead amazing kids and hopefully be the most epic leader with the most epic discussions ever.  If I remove my playful side for a second, it means I get to do my best to help them learn from each other, learn from themselves, and learn from me.  As an added bonus, I get to learn from them as well.

2. I might get to see my old roommate who lives in Omaha, NE

3. Seeing Switchfoot in concert and all the events at the Superdome in NO.

4. Getting to see the cities of St. Louis, Memphis, New Orleans, and Kansas City, and see states new to me which include the following: Nebraska, Kansas (if we drive through it), Missouri, Tennessee, Mississippi, Alabama, Louisiana, and Arkansas. 

4. Just plain traveling and all the shenanigans that'll be happening. Oh, and did I mention I get to go to the Civil Rights Museum, French Quarter, Beale Steet, and go on a swamp tour? EPIC!!!

As you can see, my life has taken a turn for the even more epic. I'm sure more blog entries about NOLA are to follow. I'm so excited, and suuuper nervous at the same time. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to go pinch myself repeatedly.

I send ALL the love!  Be epic and be well.

-Megan

A Good Kind of Pain

Reader, I'm procrastinating on a philosophy take-home final that I've discovered will take me forever.  Not joking.  6 hardcore essay questions worth 50 points each.  It counts for 25% of my class grade.  I wish that was all I had to worry about, but unfortunately I have a Sociology exam and Cognitive Psych final to worry about before I make my journey home on Saturday.

I've been dealing with a bit of pain all day.  I slept fine, and didn't get too bruised up from taking down my loft and putting the bunk back up--no this isn't anything like that.  This is heartache, complete and utter heartache.  With how busy we've been over the last three weeks, there's been no time to simply let the facts sink in. This is all coming to a sudden and abrupt end whether we feel ready for it or not, and believe me, I don't feel ready for it.  At all. Crap... here come the teary eyes.

As much as this hurts, I'm so glad it does.  I sometimes disagree with the old cliché "No pain, no gain" but this is a good pain, such a good pain.  My heart is aching in the most wonderful way because it means I don't want to leave, that I have found a home here.  It means that all of this, and I mean ALL of this feels right.  I ache because of memories, because I won't laugh until I cry nearly as often.  Usually, pain means something is wrong, and in this case it means that something right is coming to an end.  It's perhaps, the absence of what is right.

There are horror stories out there where individuals experience maladaptive pain reception/response and their lives are a constant struggle of self-awareness to figure out if anything is wrong.  Parents of these individuals often say they'd give anything for their child to feel pain.  Like I said, this pain means something good is changing, and that's not to say summer will be bad, but here has become home and leaving home is always so bittersweet...

It's like, do you ever feel like the pieces are starting to fall into place, even if you can't quite tell what the end result will be?  That's how I feel.  I'm practically giddy with the feeling that we're hurling towards something good.  I just don't know what it'll be yet.  All I know is that I get that feeling here.  I've never laughed so hard for so long, nor have I felt such a sense of solidarity and belonging like I do in certain situations being here has allowed me to experience.

As I type this, there's a rabbit sitting 3 feet outside my window... it's munching on the most tender dandelions, but it's chewing well over a mile a minute and often freezes.  I just want it to relax.  I want it to slow down and take a look around and appreciate this moment, to know that it's all going to be okay.  The trees on campus are in full bloom and the scent is breathtaking, literal in more ways than one, but the allergies are totally worth the beauty.

Even though it is finals week and I'm procrastinating on the philosophy final, life is good.  This pain is good.  Ripping apart the web that has formed here is good, because like muscles, these connections only grow stronger by being shredded and allowed to repair.  Time will ease the pain to be sure, but I can't wait for next year. 

Good things come to an end.  Luckily for us this isn't the end, just a long, long rest. 

This song feels like an accurate summary of my life in this very moment, both the joy of returning home to see my one family, both blood related and otherwise, as well as the pain of leaving my family here.  I'll miss them, and you can bet I'll be playing this song in the weeks before school starts up again.  It's also the first song on Concordia's Beat, a CD that features student performers.  Personally the version on the CD is better. :P

Love life, be brave, understand that pain is not forever, nor is it always a bad thing.

-Megan

Mini Heart Attack

Hiya Reader,

I hope you're well, I'm crashing a college lounge before my sociology class.  Love the professor but not a huge fan of some of the subject matter as of late.

So when someone mentions an epic life, what comes to mind is typically a lot of really big, really intense events, like skydiving or going on a safari, or having a celebrity friend or something.  I would challenge that an epic life is really just a bunch of nice little occurrences that build up over time or remain somewhat constant.  They're just those little life moments that make you realize you can catch a break once in a while.

Case in point, those little mini heart attacks that turn out to be false alarms.  You all know what I'm talking about, that instant rush of adrenaline when you're heart speeds out of control after you miss a step, after someone says "Can I ask you something?" and perhaps the most devastating of all the mini heart attacks, the misreading of the alarm clock.

See, I rarely sleep through the night, so when I wake up I always check the clock to see how much time I have left.  I wake up anytime between 2 and 7 usually and have my alarm set for 7:30, though rarely do I roll out of bed until 7:45 if not later.  Last night I woke up at precisely 5:59, and I'm not quite sure what I was seeing, but I saw 9:59, and my first class starts at 10:30.  Cue mini heart attack.  Eventually I got my sight back and breathed a sigh of relief before going back to bed for another two hours.  You would have thought the fact that my room was still fairly pitch black would have been a good clue...

My point is that sometimes you catch breaks, and that mini heart attack was really just an overreaction or misinterpretation.  Heck, sometimes you even get two more hours to lay back and relax.

Be well, be epic, and have a wonderful week.

-Megan

End of the Road

Hello Reader,

May your Sunday be lazy, but not rainy as mine seems to be.  I can hear the constant dripping of water outside my window and perhaps needless to say... I'm keeping the curtain closed.

My college is wrapping up their presentation of Camino Real by Tennessee Williams with their final performance today. Camino Real means "end of the road" and that's precisely where we, mostly I, find myself today.

The academic year is almost over.  I'll have to commence a furious search for full-time employment within the next couple weeks.  I'll have to pack up my life and leave my new home to go back to a place that now feels less like home and more like a vacation destination.  Lovely to be at, and comfortable to be sure, but no where I really want to live...

One can approach this end of the road with celebration, fear, cautious optimism, melancholic moping--the kind that makes you lapse into thunderous applause and numerous pats on the back when you realize you had the guts to drag your sorry butt out of bed--or they can approach it with all of those reactions previously listed, as I seem to have been doing in a vicious cycle over the last week or so.

The fact remains... this is it.  This is the curtain call on this particular play, this particular year in my (mostly epic) life, but good thing there is ample evidence of its existence. Good thing our year has been documented, both digitally, and with not so carefully written letters, almost too numerous to count.  There's the facebook statuses, the tweets, the tumblr posts, the BLOGS--100 posts now on Dorm Room 718, and of course, our memories that we shouldn't necessarily discount. Oh, and the folded ticket stubs carefully tucked away in my wallet. This roller coaster has left its mark quite visibly on a number of mediums, including human hearts.

Was it good?  Bad?  Horrible? EPIC?!  Hindsight will be 20/20, but it's been all of it.

Now this isn't the last post of the school year by any means, but know that it's winding down, speeding up, and doing everything in between.

Let's resolve to let the epicness continue.

-Megan

Personal Experiment Completed!

Hi Reader,

I hope you had a wonderful Easter holiday!

A few weeks ago, in this post--> Personal Experiment I started my own personal experiment to see whether or not I could go the entire duration of Lent without eating meat.  Essentially, I became a not-so-strict vegetarian.  I am proud to say that I made it!  I think I frustrated a few people with such an abrupt decision, but everyone complied even if they didn't know my logic or reasoning.  I declared the experiment officially over and celebrated with ham yesterday. :P

The real goal of that decision wasn't really fueled by any desire to become a vegetarian.  It was more like a personal challenge and a fun experiment that was spurned by a particularly long period of boredom and what felt like personal stagnation.  Being vegetarian is really quite easy these days, especially on our college campus where everything is labeled as such.  I do not envy younger or older vegetarians by any means, but that being said, I thought it would be more difficult.  I really think mine was facilitated by the company I keep.  It's, not surprisingly, easy to be vegetarian in the company of vegetarians.  Do I see myself becoming full-fledged and long term in the future?  Honestly, yes, I do.  I just don't know if that's going to happen right now.  Right now I just want some bacon.

So what did I learn?  I learned that I really am capable of making life changes if I have the right type of motivation.  I think I caught the experimental bug.  I like to challenge myself and I'm beginning to realize that I'll learn the most and perhaps experience the most growth from challenges I impose on myself.  So what should my next challenge be?  Well, I definitely hope to do something over summer, whether that's write every day (not on the blog) or something else, but at least now I have some evidence that I can maintain a change.

I am so happy I did this.

Be epic, be well, and go experiment with your life.

-Megan